Monday, February 23, 2009

How did I get here? I need a nap.

I always look like I have my shit together, for the most part.  House is neat, tidy and tastefully decorated in a modern style with a touch of Pottery Barn comforts....check!  Children are bathed, fed, dressed...check!  I can throw a dinner party at the last minute (with the help of a few cocktails of course to help creative cooking juices flowing)....check!  I always change into proper attire, meaning I get out of my yoga pants or pyjamas before my husband returns home and I have a freshly made-up face with just a subtle glow and a hint of perfume, usually Rose Absolut by Stella....check!

Half of the time I feel like I don't have a clue if I'm coming or going or what I'm doing.  I do the countdown almost everyday.....three hours till naptime, five hours until bedtime.  I have never had such a love and strong craving for alcohol.  I am always thinking of a nice robust glass of red wine, perhaps something from Chile.  How did I end up with two babies, a husband, three cats, a house and fly around the world on an airplane for a living?  I was so not a mother-in-the making.  I never would have guessed that my days would consist of play dates, time-outs and diapers.  I'm bloody exhausted just writing about this.  

My life pre-belly pudge consisted of me and only me and then hubby of course.  I dined at all of the hot spots, never waited in line at a club or lounge, I worked out and was reading only material that was considered au courant.  Yadayadayadayada.   This by all means is not a pity party however, I am posing the question which pops up frequently, how did I become so ordinary?  I certainly don't feel ordinary on the inside and on some days I would even be bold enough to call myself a 'yummy mummy' even though I don't like that term at all.  For me, that term congers up images of only the select few that have given birth and that have overcome or have not been afflicted by the stereotypes of boring moms, selfless women with boring dialogues, inflated bodies and boring vajajays!  Ahemmm, I beg to differ.

My saving grace throughout all of these changes and all of my ups and downs in my life is makeup.  Its like a lover that my husband knows about and wouldn't dare try to compete with because he knows he would lose.  Its like a drug and my drug of choice is MAKEUP!! Don't ask my why because I couldn't tell you and I couldn't care less what others think.  Its my thing.

When I need a moment to regroup or catch my breath or prepare myself to give someone heck, in the nicest of ways (annoying passenger, whining children, nagging mother, nosy neighbour) I apply my lipstick or gloss.  As I call it, 'I'm having a gloss moment'.  I honestly think that when I'm having a stressful time makeup is the only thing that keeps me grounded and keeps me from walking the edge.  That and the sweet, clean scent of my children's hair when they are giving ordinary Mamma a hug and when my husband gives me, the 'yummy mummy', that look from across the table.  

I am blessed and I am happy but as you can tell I'm also a little batty.  Not so ordinary.  I think I need a glass of wine and a nap.

I have never blogged before, not sure what has compelled me to start now, therefore, I'm not sure what the protocol or blogging etiquette is, so forgive my ramblings.

3 comments:

Anna said...

Your writing style is so beautiful!! Yes, I am snooping around your blog :) I loved this post, I want to favourite it somehow like you do on YT with videos!! LOL! xoxo Anna

lipstickrules123 said...

I too am snooping around your blog and reading older posts. First, I didn't even realize you were also from Canada! So exciting. And second, this was a great post -- you captured some of the feelings I am having as well. Keep writing - you have a great writer's voice!

Sarah Bella said...

I came to your blog tonight to read again how you liked the IPL and started reading this post (again because I've read it before)... you are a realllyyy talented writer. Wow. You HAVE to write a book... and I have just the book for you to write. ;)I've already written 3 pages of what I think would make a good book but sheesh.. I think I need to pass it on to you.

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